If you have been hurt in the past by an ex, you are definitely not alone. We all know that some relationships manage to last a lifetime, while others come to an abrupt end due to a variety of unfortunate things such as incompatibility, infidelity, etc. Well, the important thing you should remember if you have ever had your heart broken is that it IS it possible for you to love again. It may not seem plausible right after a bad break-up or devastating divorce, but there is hope and there will always be hope.
Once you have let your heart heal and feel that it is time to get back into the dating game, there are some things you are going to have to ask yourself. To help you determine if you are ready or not to re-begin your search for true love, I have compiled a list of the best questions to ask yourself before dating again.
What and who am I looking for?
The very first thing you will need to establish before entering the dating pool again is what and who you are looking for. You want to have a clear idea of what you want and what you don’t want in a relationship in order to find the perfect match for you. Your last relationship likely taught you a few valuable lessons, so now you can put those to good use. If you haven’t gained any clarity about what it is you’re looking for, you might just never find it.
What kind of relationship do I want?
You also want to be sure about the kind of relationship you are wanting to get in. If you are only wanting to casually date, own that. If you want to simply meet people and see where things go, that works too. And if you want to dive into a serious relationship, that is perfectly fine as well. Defining your expectations before making yourself available for dates allows you to find someone who is on the same page in order to avoid being let down.
Am I willing to adapt to change?
If you haven’t dated in the past few years or so, you will quickly realize that things have changed when it comes to meeting and dating. This is why you should be open to adapting to these modern changes in the dating game. For example, dating apps are helping daters weed out those who might not be good matches for them in order to focus on ones that have the best potential. Yes, no longer do you have to go on date after date just to find someone who is compatible with you.
What kind of impression do I want to make?
Another thing that you should consider before dating again following a break-up or divorce is the kind of impression you want to make when on dates. While you may be tempted to ramble on about the hurt you have experienced in your past relationship, it is best to refrain from this as it may turn off a partner who would otherwise be interested. Instead you should focus on the unique attributes that make you who you are.
Am I ready to be disappointed?
Okay. Let’s face it. Not all first dates lead to a second and then a long term relationship or marriage. This is why you need to make sure that you are ready to be faced with disappointment before you begin dating again. To avoid feeling heartbroken, don’t invest all of your feelings right away. It is better to take things slowly when you first begin dating after a breakup.
Now that you have reviewed my list of the crucial things you need to ask yourself before dating again, are you ready to schedule that first date or download that dating app? Hopefully these 5 tips have helped you prepare to re-enter the dating world after experiencing a tough breakup or painful divorce. Just remember that every heart heals at its own pace, so don’t try to rush into anything that you are not ready for.